LOVE FOR THE WIN | What part of me needs some love and attention today? Renee Gebhart, LCSW, MSW, Therapist & Life Coach, guides us through the everyday and... Valentine's Day.
What is your reaction to Valentine’s Day? How do you look at the day?
- Excitement…. an opportunity to celebrate love?
- Dread? Uncertainty? Do you want to hide out?
- Annoyed by a commercialized “Hallmark Holiday”?
- Does it depend on your relationship “status” or lack thereof? Is the quality of your relationship or “situationship” coloring your feelings about the day?
I’ve been “there” …. single and date-less, newly coupled & feeling awkward, coupled & loving it, unhappily married & ambivalent, divorced …and REPEAT!
Wherever YOU are, it’s ok. V-day is one day of one year of your life. However, it is a great day to stop and think about how to love YOU! And regardless of your relationship status, self-love is important. A lot of women I talk with struggle with that.
What does self-love mean for you? I find it involves a combination of self-care, self-worth, and self-knowing.
- Self-care is more than bubble baths & spa appointments, but that can be a start! Doing things that nurture your mind, body, and spirit is part of self-care.
- Self-worth is about knowing & believing that you are worthy & deserving of care & love.
- Self-knowing involves being mindful of your inner world (thoughts, feelings, sensations, needs, wants, desires, & preferences). This allows you to have an intimate relationship with yourself & with others. Intimacy can be broken down into this meaning: “into me I see”. When self-knowing/intimacy is present you have better building blocks for the foundation of your relationships.
Many women struggle with one or more of these aspects as they go together. If so, consider the following:
- What parts of you do you like, love, cherish, and honor? How can you celebrate those aspects of you?
- What parts of you are harder to like, love, cherish, and honor…. what aspects of you do you push down or away, deny & ignore? What is needed to allow & accept ALL parts of you?
- Are you paying attention to your mind, body, and spirit? Where is attention most needed?
I ask myself this question daily: “what part of me needs some (or the most) love or attention today?” and then plan on how & when I will honor that. I hope these questions are helpful to you….!
My Valentine’s wish for you is that you believe you are worthy & loveable, you engage in regular practices of self-care, and become increasingly & lovingly mindful of your inner world.
I hope you have significant people in your world that affirm your being...Afterall, we are meant to be in relationship with others!
And regardless of relationship status, we are all divine beings deserving of love, care, and attention!
ABOUT THE AUTHOR | Renee loves people's stories & would love to know yours. Helping clients feel better about themselves, their relationships, and their work makes her happy. As a LCSW, Renee has provided individual, couple, and family counseling, given presentations, & was an Assistant Professor of Social Work at UAFS. Renee currently provides coaching & therapy.